Make a point of honestly catching yourself feeling superior to things, people, and emotions. Observe yourself in a way that you catch yourself not being able to take advantage of real opportunities for legitimate humility that life grants you to heal from what oppresses you.
Hold on. Go back to the first paragraph and read it again, but now paying attention to each word. Ready? Seriously, go back. I need you to think about what you just read, to have a serious conversation about what we just read together.
Okay. Now, the second important thing to say is even more evident, but often disregarded by us most of the time. And that thing is:
Life is really hard. And to find a possible sanity with this giant load of natural suffering, to learn how to deal with the weight of our mind and live with the inaccuracy about the future, we need to embrace all true opportunities to be humble. None can escape.
What does humility have to do with the ability to live better? Well, for starters, being able to step back from the temptation of arrogance will make you see life in a more lucid way.
Humility is not the denial of virtue, but the recognition that an attribute is a gift. Wisdom lives with humble people. This means that knowing how to act goes through modesty. So, moderation, sobriety, and simplicity make you act more. Not as cowardice in the face of problems, but as a marker of tolerance. Not as a limit to attitudes, but as a reformulation of strategies.
I know the magical power of remedying things when they’re not going well, but I also know that better than doping oneself with reality is to have a scenario of visibility for a complete cure of certain chaos. Procrastinating suffering by not dealing with it is the mark of the arrogant. The humble person bends to their possible capabilities.
What’s interesting is that I’ve noticed one of the things that characterizes people who develop difficulties absorbing life is that they are often naive in not realizing themselves in front of the mirror. So, they idolize structures designed for self-reality that are not really within a framework of thought and achievable attitudes.
People without humility stumble on the carpets of labels. I have the impression that this mentality is responsible for leading us to incomplete paths and ends up fragmenting the concrete and amplifying the feeling that they are devastated, without alternatives, therefore, without resources.
If you ask a proud person what they will do, they will immediately come up with an action plan. Even if it has no effectiveness. That’s how they act emotionally. They are addicted to their desires as they move through life.
Of course, healing wounds takes time and resources. More than that, it requires an openness with humility to know that help needs to be close. If you suffer from any difficulty in facing life, you need to understand that humility is directly related to our ability to evolve and the willingness to learn and change. Humble people are better problem solvers.
There are no practical alternatives for someone who cannot accurately distinguish what resilience means and what strength means. Similarly, it is unlikely to see progress in those who cannot understand that vulnerability is not a sign of weakness but rather, it’s not resisting knowing our darkest side.
Without being completely free of pride, you may come face to face with reality and feel small in front of it, even if you say, think, and react as if you were in a controlled environment. Humility is not feeling like you are not relevant, but knowing that you are not especially affected by things and that this does not make you more affected by difficulties.
Acknowledging the dark side within us is what allows a change in our posture. A conversation with a therapist can significantly help you with this mission. With answers and indications of clearer paths, you can change some behavior patterns and modify a lifestyle.
Your subjective experience in the face of feelings, the demanding world, and daily challenges is essential to help answer good questions about what you need to do with who you have become.
Only then is it possible to discover the reasons why your heart, soul, and mind end up invaded with dark feelings. To deal with a complicated side of your personality or even gain new ways of evaluating embarrassing episodes in your life, you have to gain the ability to strip down in front of the mirror.
Lack of humility will prevent you from knowing if what you need is really what you want. Healing may mean some undesirable paths. Even if it means you may need a social worker, a moment with a psychiatrist, or a conditioning of good habits.
Although you may think that this darkness may just be a common marital problem, something crazy that is happening temporarily, an unexpected illness, devastating news, a significant loss, or anything else that makes it difficult to find satisfaction in life, you need to have the humility to learn how you can be better with this issue.
The important thing is to understand what is happening. Perhaps there is a history of trauma or an abusive situation by someone you are protecting, or a silly projection about some current situation. Maybe it’s socio-economic circumstances that push you towards dissatisfaction, it may be a matter of not knowing how to impose self-respect, something related to productivity or some chemical energy imbalance in the body that makes you feel insufficient. All of this requires humility.
There is an infinite range of things that impact you and that need to be calculated, observed, and conducted in the best possible way by you. Be humble. Treat what you have lived, what you are living, and what you will live with the deserved respect. Treating yourself as someone powerful, even while being intimately miserable, is attractive. Avoid that. Reconcile with life gradually, at your own pace, in the way that is possible, but with consistency and humility.